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Don’t Marry A Soldier

Introduction Torture Glossary Cindy Sheehan Protest
9/11 Bush’s Five Big Lies The Muslims Will Kill Us All!
Bush’s Untrue WMD Statements Don’t Marry A Soldier
American Terrorists How You Know Bush Lied about WMDs Don’t Enlist
American War Criminals Iraq War Motives Do Enlist
Disrespecting American Soldiers Altruistic War Motives The Coming Draft
Joke Selfish War Motives The Ideal War
Iraq War Casualty Pictures Popular War Motives Spoken Word Links
Abu Ghraib Torture Pictures Economic Cost of the Iraq War Video Links
Navy Seals Pictures Beheadings Books
Fallujah Pictures History Related Essays by Roedy
DU Baby Pictures Why The Iraqis Fight So Hard Links
Culprit Pictures What The Iraqis Want Taking Action
Protester Pictures Republican Denial What You can Do
Links To Pictures Republicans Pretend Not To Notice Mark Twain’s War Prayer
Body Counts Saddam Hussein War Is A Racket
Defense Science Board Future Wounds by Dr. Norman Bethune
Atrocities Mind Your Own Business! How Will The Iraq War End?
Tortures Why I Despise Most Americans Conclusions
Guilty of Torture God On Our Side

Don’t Marry A Soldier

typical US soldier in Iraq
typical US soldier in Iraq
The main reason there are so many sexual psychopaths and serial killers (aka soldiers) in the world is that women find them sexually exciting.
~ Roedy (1948-02-04 age:70)

Single soldiers are usually young, handsome and athletic. No wonder they so easily turn a girl’s head. However, here are 49 reasons I think you should not marry a military man or woman. You will never make a bigger mistake in your life. I use the term soldier with the same metonomy Buffy St. Marie used in her song The Universal Soldier to stand for all military people. This applies not just to the US military, though most of my examples are taken from the USA. Think of it as like a prose folk song, something a father might sing to his daughter. You must use your head as well as your heart.

  1. Military personnel have a divorce rate twice that of civilians. 43% of all military marriages end in divorce within 10 years. source. Why would military marriages be so fragile? Keep reading.
  2. In 2009, 6000 vets committed suicide. Why? Because they were so ashamed of themselves that they felt compelled to execute themselves. Think how many more vets are crippled with guilt who want to commit suicide but can’t quite bring themselves to do it. Do you want to risk marrying someone who deserts you by killing himself? Do you want to be married to a man who has committed deeds so terrible he feels suicide is the only way to atone for them? Do you want to be tied to someone who is so suicidally depressed that no treatment or medication helps? Do you want a man in your bed, or near your kids, who has committed deeds so unspeakably awful he is too ashamed to tell anyone what they were. This psycho signed a contract when he enlisted agreeing to kill any child for no reason other than he was ordered to. It would be like asking Michael Vick to take care of your puppy while you were on vacation.

    Psychopaths are incredibly charming. They appear to be kinder and more considerate than normal folk. They have to keep up this act because they don’t actually have normal feelings. When they are exposed, everyone is astounded that such a nice fellow could commit such crimes. Look at the evidence. If you partner has any history of killing or torturing others, he could well eventually come for you or your family under the right stressors. Even Hitler was kind to his dogs. Watching him interact with them, you would never guess what he was capable of. Now 18 vets a day commit suicide — considerably more than are killed in combat. If that many actually kill themselves, that means there are hundreds of times that number utterly miserable, just dragging through life wishing they could kill themselves. Consider the effect of his protracted depression, then suicide on you and your children. Even if he does not go all the way to suicide, you will be the breadwinner for the entire family, plus all the duties of wife and mother. He will just drag you down into the pit of despair with him if you don’t divorce him.

    In the past decade, the US Army lost more soldiers to suicide than to enemy fire in Afghanistan.
    ~ Rachel Maddow (1957-04-01 age:61) Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power

    Since the soldiers know better than anyone exactly what is going on in Afghanistan and Iraq and they are killing themselves in record numbers, presumably what the soldiers are doing is quite a bit more shameful than the administration lets on.

    When soldiers return from Afghanistan they often either attempt suicide or complete it. Everyone knows that combat often leads to PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), brain damage and suicide. Suicide is more common than death in combat. So the most important question is, why did these people enlist to go to Afghanistan in the first place?

  3. Your loved one will be off for months and years at a time. He may be back only days before being shipped out again. This can be a pretty lonely life. If you have children, you will be largely raising them by yourself. Without a full time father, they are more likely to have behavioural problems. Your husband will probably be away when your children are born, leaving you to endure labour alone and missing those crucial first hours of bonding. Ask any child of a military man. They make distant, aloof fathers. They don’t bond properly.
  4. The military whips recruits into good physical shape. It is hard not to be swept away by that trim athletic body. That is about the only plus and even that won’t last forever. If you do decide to marry a soldier, that is probably the real reason. Hormones are taking over your brain. You are picking a good mate as if you lived in a cave and needed a muscular brute to protect you from wild animals. Think of the misery you know others have found marrying a handsome bastard.
  5. If your husband participates is an aggressive war (illegal first strike war) such as Afghanistan or Iraq, he is guilty of a capital war crime, even if he just peeled potatoes. The USA currently does not recognise the authority of the world court and acts to protect its vets from prosecution. However, the USA will not always be the world’s only superpower and won’t be able to thumb its nose at the world court forever. In the meantime, other countries are treaty bound to prosecute your husband if he steps on their soil. Most don’t do it because they fear the American reprisal, but that will not necessarily always be true. There is no statute of limitations on war crimes. Prosecuted or not, you are still married to a war criminal, guilty of the same crime as the Nazis hanged at the end of WWII (World War II).
  6. Unless he reaches high rank, he will never be able to provide for you and your family properly. Many soldiers’ wives live worse than those on welfare.
  7. You will be transferred over and over. You have to pull up roots on a moments notice and move off somewhere else. You have no say in the matter. If you have children, they will become army brats, children who never learn to socialise with other children since they are never in one place long enough to make lasting friends, children who do poorly in school because of the repeated disruptions. You can’t have a career of your own because you are forced over and over to quit without notice. All this moving means you can’t put down roots anywhere or make lasting friends. You are nothing more than the wife of your husband, a decorative adjunct without value in your own right. You won’t even have the support of your family since they may be continent’s away. If you have children, your mother and father will hardly ever get to hang out with their grandchildren; that is quite selfish. You may be forced to transfer your young family to some third world country, ripe with parasites, tropical diseases, poisonous insects and snakes. Even if you don’t transfer, your husband will bring back these parasites, tropical diseases and funguses back to infect you and your children.
  8. You will constantly dread that phone call or knock on the door to let you know your husband has been seriously injured or killed. There will be a knock on the door. There will be a man in crew cut standing there who says, I am sorry for your loss in a rather wooden, bored way. You will have to start your life all over from scratch. Or it could be your husband himself in a wheelchair, looking many pounds overweight, speaking in a halting, brain-damaged, distracted voice, like someone with Alzheimer’s, with an ostomy bag strapped to his stomach. Loss of genitals is a common injury. For the rest of his life, you are obligated to be his nurse rather than his wife. All he will be capable of doing is eating, drinking beer and watching TV.
  9. remains of a US soldierYour husband can be killed at any time. It is a sword of Damocles over your head for his entire career. He will leave you to care for your family as a single parent.
  10. About 80% of soldiers returning from combat suffer from PTSD. He may panic at any loud sound. He may wake up in the night screaming. He may attack you imagining you are an enemy soldier. He may become paranoid. Make sure you learn what PTSD is before you presume love will automatically give you the resources to deal with it. If you are unlucky, you will spend the rest of your life tending a mentally ill person who will be no company at all. There are so many men out there unlikely ever to get PTSD. Why waste your time on a cripple?
  11. Women have anonymously complained that the military trains their men to hide emotions. They become emotional clams unwilling to face any emotional or relationship problem. This drives women crazy. Men in general have this tendency to some extent anyway.
  12. If you discovered your fiancé had murdered his previous two wives, you might have second thoughts, ditto if you had discovered he had murdered a dozen strangers of random ages and genders just because he was paid to. You are considering marrying a man who is under unbreakable contract to the government to kill strangers and who may have already done it. If he later gets a crisis of conscience and refuses to kill one of his assigned targets, he can he shot on the spot. What kind of person signs such a contract? Not even Mafioso enslave themselves to that extent.
  13. Force always attracts men of low morality.
    ~ Albert Einstein (1879-03-14 1955-04-18 age:76)
    Soldiers often do some disreputable things under peer pressure that they avoid talking about. This is includes drinking to excess, whoring, drug-taking, raping, bullying and terrorising, hazing, killing and raping children and torturing. The fundamentalist Taliban had eliminated drug trafficking. Under US military control, Afghanistan has risen to #1 heroin producer in the world, selling over a trillion dollars worth a year. This could not happen if US soldiers were not complicit in the drug trade. Recall that a significant number of US soldiers returned from Viet Nam addicted to heroin. The remote control nature of much of modern warfare ensures the primary targets will be children and civilians. A soldier often does not even see his victims. When he kills blindly like this e.g. with napalm, cluster bombs, land mines or white phosphorus, in a third world country like Iraq where most of the people are under 15, inevitably he kills more children than adults and civilians than soldiers. In addition when American soldiers attack they have a massive advantage in power, armaments and technology. This power corrupts them to toy with the civilian populations, to torment them for amusements like a child tormenting insects. The military likes remote control warfare because it keeps their soldiers safe and it protects the soldiers from emotionally feeling the impact of their butchery. These soldiers look just like anyone else. You would never guess from the soldiers’ clean-cut faces what mischief they have been up to. Recall the pudgy boyish face of Lt. Calley of the Mai Lai massacre in Viet Nam. The domestic charms of house and home don’t quite do it for them anymore. These sadistic desires were always in the background. The thrill of violence was part of the appeal for them enlisting — to commit cruel acts without any possibility of legal repercussions. When you marry a soldier, you are marrying someone more prone to abusing you and your children too. His standards of what constitutes acceptable behaviour are warped by war experience.
  14. A Canadian soldier returned from the relatively gentle Afghanistan war with PTSD. He repeatedly abused his infant triplet sons, breaking 19 of their bones. He blamed the attacks on his condition. Do you really want someone with PTSD anywhere near your kids or near you? The New England Journal of Medicine reported that American soldiers returning from Iraq are being sent home to their families without treatment. According to MSNBC one in eight soldiers returning from Iraq are suffering from PTSD. Less than half seek treatment. Some soldiers are able to separate their family life from their life as killers. They may appear completely normal and loving, though obviously it is great stress to do so.
  15. double amputee
    double amputee
    Your husband can suffer a brain injury or be made a paraplegic. This is 2 to 8 times as likely as death depending whom you ask. Professor Stiglitz of Columbia University said that as of 2006-01, there were more than 7000 servicemen with brain, spinal, amputation and other serious injuries and about 20% of those injured have suffered major head or spinal injury. This turns him into a giant infant who has to be feed, bathed and diapers changed. You are morally stuck with caring for him 24/7 for the rest of your life whether you continue to love him or not.
  16. When you rip off the pretty bunting, what the military is about is killing, torturing, maiming and terrorising people. In modern warfare, most of the victims are civilians and most of those are children. On some level, your husband was drawn to this killing. There is a cloak of respectability, even nobility that the government casts over it, but when you get down to it, soldiers do the exact same thing as Mafia hit men — kill just because they were ordered too. Though they give lip service to personal responsibility, they are brainwashed to the point disobeying an order becomes unthinkable. They consider deciding who has the right to live a superior’s total responsibility. At Nuremberg, humanity proclaimed that claiming I was just following orders. is not sufficient excuse for murder. Your potential husband, agrees with the Nazis. He thinks he is morally off the hook so long as someone else gave him permission to murder. How else could he make up excuses for killing civilians and children? Do you really want this man passing those sorts of dark genes to your offspring? Instead of spawning more little soldiers, you could just as well spawn more little criminals. What sort of woman are you to choose such genes for your children. It is as sick as marrying a criminal on death row. Every soldier swears up and down he never killed any civilians and never saw it happen. Oddly though, if you look at the statistics, on average, one civilian gets killed for every US soldier serving in Iraq, so it has to be common. Perhaps they don’t count deaths by incendiary chemicals, squashing with armoured vehicles, bombs burying alive in rubble or land mines, only shooting.
  17. You also might wonder about a man that selected an occupation that would keep him away from his wife most of the time, especially when he spends that time in the company of young fit men excluding the company of women. If he is a closeted homosexual or bisexual, getting married primarily to satisfy the demands of his parents and church, you are in for a life of misery. He will never be able to truly love you. He will never be true to you. Gay men used to sign on as sailors in the days of sailing ships, but would have a wife, in name only. Even straight men in prisons and in the military without access to women often resort to homosexual encounters.
  18. Soldiers are often exposed to teratogens like DU (Depleted Uranium), herbicides (like Viet Nam’s Agent Orange laced with dioxin), chemicals, chemical warfare, biological warfare, not to mention exotic parasites and tropical diseases. This may cause cancer later, or even more likely will cause your children and their children to be genetically deformed. Would you ever forgive yourself if your child was born hideously deformed, or even mildly damaged because of the damage these agents did to your husband’s sperm? Over half the soldiers who served in the Gulf War, died of Gulf War Syndrome or were treated for it. They were in Iraq for only weeks. Your husband will be there years. Not only the returning soldiers suffered from Gulf War syndrome, but also their children and wives. Soldiers brought back loathsome diseases, parasites, toxins and radioactivity. The military, in most cases, refused medical aid.
  19. If you love and cherish your husband, you are encouraging and enabling him to do his job of soldiering. Soldiering is a sickening, revolting job, and it takes the memory of a loving wife for many to continue. You then became complicit is his war crimes. You are morally tarred with his misdeeds. Today, Canada and the USA only fight in illegal aggressive wars. They are not defending their countries as did soldiers in past. You are sacrificing yourself for goals as evil as any Nazi wife did, mostly killing civilians and children and teenagers who posed no threat to Canada, the USA or Britain. Have a look at photos of some of the children hideously tortured and killed by the likes of people just like your husband. The people who committed these atrocities appear just as sweet as your guy. They don’t have green saliva. That is his dirty secret. He gets off on killing and admit it, so do you or your heart would not be attracted to such a man.
  20. If your soldier lover woos you and holds out the promise of marriage, but never seems to pop the question, consider he may already have a wife back home and he is just using you for sex.
  21. Nazi soldiers were popular to start, but as their deeds became more and more widely known, all decent society shunned them. Soldiers who serve in illegal aggressive wars to plunder a small nation’s natural resources, such as the Afghan war or Iraq war, will over time become more and more pariahs, eventually subject to death threats and anonymous attacks, just as Nazis and Nazi collaborators were hounded. They could even face kidnapping and prosecution as international war criminals. The penalty for engaging in aggressive war at Nuremberg was death. Today it would be life imprisonment, an even crueller punishment. Consider how people who participated in the Viet Nam war have over the years become more and more pariahs. The shame of the Afghanistan and Iraq wars will be even greater because of the use of banned weapons and torture and the craven motive for the war.
  22. On 2007-10-15 a young woman told me she had gone to a bar and met a pleasant young man, who turned out be joining the military. The young woman recoiled and asked How will you feel when you are ordered to drop a bomb? You will be killing innocent people, perhaps a child. How will you feel about killing a child? He responded, It wouldn’t matter so long as it was a foreign child. This is every soldier’s true answer. He could not kill children, a required side effect of modern warfare, if he were not that callous. You can read Collateral Damage: America’s War Against Iraqi Civilians or you can check with returning vets. If a soldier is driving in a convoy, he will be ordered to run over any Iraqi child who gets in the way and not stop under any circumstances. Your boyfriend knows this and is eager for the experience. You don’t want that sort of man anywhere near your children, born or yet to be born. What sort of mother are you that you would leave your kids alone with a man who put no value on the lives of children?
  23. Military men can become addicted to combat. They crave the danger, the killing and the intense emotional involvement with other men, the adrenalin rush. Peaceful civilian life just bores them and they abandon their families over and over to get their adrenalin fix with their buddies. Sebastian Junger describes the phenomenon in his New York Times best seller  War.
    Impersonal killers are like drug addicts.
    The first time gives them the ultimate high and after that, no high is as good.
    Unfortunately, the addict doesn’t know that.
    He will chase that high to the gates of insanity and death.
    By now, killing is all our unsub[unknown subject killer] thinks about.
    He’s set up the exact same situation again and again, hoping to get the same result.
    He begins to think he’s doing it wrong.
    He becomes obsessed with improving his skills, honing his m.o.
    And tailoring his weapon to his deadly purpose.
    He figures if he gets them all just right, if he can get his technique and his tools perfected, he’ll feel that first high again.
    He’s becoming a more lethal addict.
    and he’ll never accept that the high is gone and it won’t come back.
    He’ll never stop.
    ~ Aaron Hotch Hotchner Criminal Minds played by Thomas Gibson (1962-07-03 age:55)

    This addiction to killing is what really draws soldiers to enlist for pitiful pay, long hours and disgusting, dangerous working conditions.

  24. Military life is all about giving and executing orders. Mentally healthy people don’t enjoy bullying or being bullied. By marrying a soldier you are on some level getting involved in a relationship game of dominance/submission, even S&M (Sadism & Masochism). If you are not into it yourself, you are setting yourself up for hell. The fantasy may be titillating, but the reality is for most people either terminally boring or terrifying. The military is all about hierarchy, status and blind obedience the very opposite of the teamwork equality needed for a good marriage.
  25. What do you think of the wife of a serial killer, someone who murders dozens of innocent women and children? Someone like Karla Homolka. You feel revulsion. You wonder what sort of perverse motivation attracted her to such a killer. You wonder how she could bear to lie in bed next to such a creep. That is how many people will feel about you if you a marry a soldier, aka a hit man, a serial killer paid by the military to butcher and torture innocent people with illegal horror weapons such as napalm, cluster bombs, white phosphorus and land mines. To create shock & awe, they use weapons that kill as more painfully than any civilian serial killer would devise. Even after you come to your senses and divorce the creep, the shame will stick to you for the rest of your life.
  26. How do you feel about Eva von Braun, Mrs. Adolph Hitler? She did not kill anyone, but she supported her husband in some rather unsavory acts. Were she still alive, people would spit on her and try to run her down with their cars. Your potential husband will be a war criminal, like Hitler, just not on such a grand scale, but if his deeds were known, (especially torture, white phosphorous and crimes against children), it would bring equal disapprobation on you. Some people will despise you even more than they despise the Nazi wives for your rôle is supporting and encouraging your serial killer husband. The Nazi wives had the excuse of being swept away by masterful propaganda. You don’t. You took on your support rôle with eyes wide open. You can expect the hatred toward you to grow, just as it did the Nazi wives, as the deeds of their husbands became more widely known.
  27. Many soldiers become addicted to dangerous drugs. They are easy to get and cheap in third world countries. They many not even realise they are taking heavy drugs. For example in the Viet Nam era, Viet Cong would secretly salt American soldiers’ beer with opium. Further, soldiers lied to themselves that opium in this form was harmless. They may take drugs to deal with the pressure of combat. Drugs are known under local names and soldiers kid themselves they must be harmless. Timothy McVeigh became addicted to methamphetamines while on duty in Desert Storm in Iraq. This made him psychotic. Life in a combat zone has few pleasures and many sorrows so soldiers commonly turn to drugs for relief just to cope. On top of that the government gives soldiers upper to keep them alert on long missions.
  28. Eventually the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq will be over and people from those countries will come as tourists or immigrants to the USA. It is not rocket science to find out who “served“ in Afghanistan and Iraq and even the atrocities they were involved in. Your husband’s victims may decide the only way they can have closure is to kill him, you and your entire family. This is trivially easy to accomplish in peacetime thanks to the NRA (National Rifle Association). Pray they do it in a way less painful and lingering your husband used.
  29. The invasion and occupation of Iraq is illegal.
    ~ Kofi Annan (1938-04-08 age:80)Secretary General and Boutros Boutros-Ghali (1922-11-14 2016-02-16 age:93) former Secretary General of the U.N.
    I think in this case international law stood in the way of doing the right thing.
    ~ Richard Perle (1941-09-16 age:76), 2003-11-20, Pentagon hawk, cat-stroking, Ernst Stavro Blofeld, James Bond villain pasty lookalike, admitting the Iraq war is illegal.
    Since Kofi Annan and Boutros Boutros-Ghali of the U.N. have declared the Iraq invasion and occupation illegal, your husband will technically be an international war criminal. This means he may at any time be arrested if you leave the country to travel in a country that subscribes to the International Court in The Hague. The USA may not forever be powerful enough to protect him from prosecution, even on home soil. It is a hanging offence, though more likely it will e commuted to life imprisonment. Recall that some Nazis faced prosecution even into their 90s. That possibility will hang over you the rest of your life.
  30. Many returning from Iraq become mental basket cases unable to deal with the horrors of war and the guilt at what they have done. They beat up their children and wives and are emotionally distant. Friends and family reject them. They can’t hold down a job. They become homeless. The become drug addicts and alcoholics. Look at the way American treats the homeless vets of the Viet Nam and Iraq wars begging on the streets. Watch some documentaries about the shell shocked vets. One grabbed a clerk by the throat when she did not hand over the change with sufficient respect. Others wake up screaming in the night decades later reliving trauma. Most have marital breakdown. The sound of packing bubbles popping sends a vet to the floor in cover. Another found he could not handle his job clearing up road kill since he could not shake his fear there were bombs hidden underneath the carcasses. You will become, at least to some extent, a nutcase. 28% of Canadian soldiers returning from Afghanistan are classified as having serious mental problems such as suicidal tendencies, post-traumatic stress disorder or depression. The Veteran’s Association estimates 37% of American soldiers returning from Iraq are classified as having serious mental problems. Even the Bush administration admits 15% of soldiers returning from Iraq suffer from PTSD. On 2007-11-11 CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation) Newsworld Sunday Night aired a documentary called PTSD : The War at Home about Iraq vets suffering from PTSD who snap and kill their families and neighbours. According to the documentary, to get treatment for PTSD, there in a terrible catch 22, men must sign up for another potential tour of duty in Iraq. They can’t face that so they go untreated. According to CBC Newsworld documentary, aired 2007-11-13 16% of Canadian soldiers returning from Afghanistan have a dangerous drinking problem, e.g. drunk driving.
    I feel so ashamed of myself. It is even worse than when I was in Afghanistan. I have nightmares all the time. I feel so empty because I don’t know why I did what I did in Afghanistan.
    ~ Travis , Canadian soldier returning from Afghanistan.
    Check out the DVD (Digital Video Disc) for a fictional account of what it is like to be married to one of these losers.
    dvd cover recommend DVD⇒For Colored Girlsto dvd home
    byTyler Perry
    birth1969-09-13 age:48
    Based on the play For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf. Drama about a group of black women. It tackles a number of contentious issues, most notably the hell of living with a military veteran, rape, disparate income and self esteem. It has a large cast of female black actors including: Janet Jackson, Thandie Newton, Phylicia Rashad and Whoopi Goldberg.
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  31. Watch a video of the tail end of the trial of Jeff Dahmer. He was a serial killer who killed a number of American teenagers. The mothers of the victims screamed and hurled obscenities at him. The families of your husband’s victims will feel this way about him and you also for egging him on, though they may never get the opportunity to confront you both. Strangers unrelated to the victims will also hate you and hold you in contempt for what you have done. There is no way you will ever convince any of these people to forgive you. You will be cursed in the strongest imaginable ways. People will pray daily for generations for you to be tortured in hell. Murdering, especially kids, is simply not acceptable. You are a monster if you try to claim otherwise.

    It is very common for such women to be in deep denial. They claim their partners don’t kill people, don’t kill civilians or don’t kill children. When confronted with the statistics, they either deny the statistics or say only other soldiers kill, not their man. They are also in complete denial about their rôle in supporting their husband in his career killing people. They refuse to notice they buy their groceries with money earned killing people. They are living off the avails of murder. They are totally convinced their husband is a hero, and are baffled why anyone would have anything remotely negative to say about them. They just can’t hear it when you explain why the husband is a war criminal, a murderer or a paid thug. It is not that they disagree, they just can’t hear. They keep asking over and over Why are you so angry with me? That is the strength of their denial conditioning.

  32. There are many additional reasons not to marry a soldier, which are reasons why your husband should not enlist. Many of those penalties, you will feel too.
  33. Perhaps your soldier boy has snowed you that he is a brave fighter for freedom, nobly protecting his country from the bad guys. This was true in WWII, but it certainly is not true today. First, neither Iraq nor Afghanistan attacked the USA, Britain or Canada. The Afghans and Iraqis have not killed a single civilian (unless you count mercenaries in Iraq) in a war that has waged longer than WWII. Bush claims that Saudis, not Iraqis or Afghans were behind 2001-09-11. The USA attacked unprovoked. Even the WMDs (Weapon of Mass Destructions) turned out to be a lie. Aggressive war is illegal under international law. Under the Nuremberg principles, to aid or abet such a war is a capital offence.

    The war in Iraq was not about Saddam. Saddam was captured on 2003-12-13. The war did not pause for even a second. It could not have been primarily about Saddam. Further, Saddam offered to surrender peacefully just before the invasion. Bush did not want Saddam. He wanted Iraq’s oil. Bush promised liberation, but instead bombed the residential sections of Baghdad in a Nazi-like show of Shock & Awe brutality on the opening day of the war. Decadent American cheered the spectacle live on CNN (Cable News Network) from their couches, much like Romans of old viewing a cruelty extravaganza in the Coliseum.

    Bush has no interest in even worse dictators that Saddam such as Robert Mugabe and the generals who run Sudan. Those dictators don’t have the #2 oil reserves on the planet. Further, the USA installed a puppet dictator, an ex-Unocal man, Hamid Karzai in Afghanistan whose Ministry of Vice enforces the same repressive Shari’aIslamic religious law as the Taliban. Clearly the Afghanistan war is not about freedom either.

    The notion the USA would spend $2 trillion for the freedom of Muslims is absurd, especially when Americans have a strong racist hatred of Muslims. On a per capita basis, USA is the stingiest of all the developed nations when it comes to foreign aid. Americans are not spending these stupendous sums on the wars out of the goodness of their hearts. It would be completely out of character. They are spending them to get control of trillions of dollars worth of oil. Your soldier boy is well aware of this, but he still likes to pretend he is seeking revenge for 2001-09-11, or protecting the fatherland. He is just looking for an excuse to rape, maim, torture and kill. He is a sadistic serial killer. That is what truly motivates him. Listen in when he is drunk talking to his buddies about the real reasons he likes being a soldier. No matter how smooth-talking, handsome, fit and charming he is, you don’t want to get involved with a psychopath.

  34. A soldier goes through strenuous training to teach him to obey orders without question and also to order others about brusquely. This instant obedience is considered necessary for combat conditions. However, that sort of behaviour is less than optimal in a loving relationship. The movie The Great Santini explores what happens when military reflexes leak back into family life.
  35. Some soldiers are really really stupid. They are Nazis at heart, who just go along with killing without making any effort at all to see if it is justified. They honestly think that Iraq and Afghanistan attacked the USA on 9/11 (even Bush claimed it was executed by Saudis and funded by Pakistan, setting aside all evidence for inside collusion) and they are killing peasants and children who have no weapons in order to protect their loved ones back home in the USA. These are the sort of people who appear on Jay Leno’s Jay Walking segment who are so out of touch with world events they don’t even know the name of their president. They don’t make any effort to see if the murders they are about to commit are justified because they fantasise they will enjoy killing. They don’t want the facts to interfere with their fun. Someone that stupid, that cruel and that selfish will never make an adequate bread winner.
  36. The problem with marrying a soldier is that his is already married to the military. You will always play second fiddle. He will always do what they want, not what you want. The military will decide what country you live in, whom you socialise with, when your husband will leave you and for how long. They will decide whom your husband will kill next and what risks he will take. They will even decide what sort of haircut he has and how he wears his facial hair. They will decide where your kids go to school. They will decide your income. You are marrying a Momma’s boy who likes being told what to do and by someone who is not you.
  37. However, if you are foreign born and just want to get a meal ticket to the US-economy gravy train, marrying a soldier might make sense. He will be away most of the time, so you won’t have to have much sex with him. There is a good chance he will get his head blown off by an IED (Improvised Explosive Device) or turned into a mental vegetable. You can then marry someone else, without all his drawbacks, while you are still young.
  38. Since time immemorial, man have escaped their duty to look after their children by running away to war.
  39. Some of these points you will see clearly apply to the guy you are thinking of marrying. Some of these points clearly do not apply. Some disadvantages you may be unwilling to accept, but could well prove to apply later. All I ask is that you think deeply before leaping into a marriage that could ruin your life. Ask other women who have married men similar to the one you are planning to marry about the advantages and disadvantages.
  40. The military has a culture demeaning to women. Women soldiers universally complain of sexual harassment and rape. Male soldiers refer even to their girlfriends as pussy. Getting drunk and screwing whores is the traditional military bonding ritual. The military culture teaches soldiers to treat women as objects, useful only for raw physical sexual gratification. This makes them easier to kill without hesitation or guilt.
  41. The military drills its soldiers to believe that violence is legitimate and to act on orders without thinking, without any hesitation. It also teaches them bullying and torture are a legitimate way to get what they want. Do you seriously want a man in your home with that sort of conditioning? who will react violently without thinking? It would be a bit like choosing a pit bull rescued from a dog fighting ring as a family pet.
  42. Women who are sexually attracted to men who kill children should not be permitted near children either, not even their own.
  43. A soldier makes huge sacrifices, abandoning his loved ones and family, risking health and life, eating revolting food and living in crowded, stinking barracks. He risks brain damage and psychological trauma. Why? In WWII it was to defend the homeland. That does not apply today. Neither Afghanistan nor Iraq is the remotest threat to the homeland. It is for the opportunity to hunt people, kill people, hurt people, torture people, bully people and in some cases rape and torture children. When he comes home, those dark desires won’t miraculously disappear. Sooner or later he will take out his violence urges on you and your children.
    Belgian soldiers torturing a a Somali boy Belgian UN (United Nations) troops forced a young Somali to eat pork (extreme Islamic taboo), drink salt water, and then eat his own vomit. Others roasted a Somali boy over a flaming fire and urinated on a murdered Somali. These are Belgians, not Nazis, Russians or Americans. Belgians are the people who perfected chocolate and pommes frite. Why did these Belgian soldiers do this? Look at the glee on the face of the soldier on the left in the photo. These men are sadists. They enlisted for opportunities to humiliate and hurt people. There no possible motive of self-defence. Belgium is not under attack and if it were, the entire EU would race to its defence. This same sadism is the reason young Americans enlisted for the Afghan and Iraq wars. It is the same reason no sane young woman (or man) should consider marrying a soldier of any nationality.
    ~ Roedy (1948-02-04 age:70)
  44. If you marry a soldier, you may have children with him. 50% of their genes will be his. Your children may well inherit his propensity for violence and homicide. It may express itself it socially unacceptable ways. They too may grow up to be hired killers.
  45. Children usually adore their fathers and mimic him in every detail. They take their values from him. You see it all the time, generations of military families where sons grow up to be killers to please their fathers.
  46. Soldiers are trained to kill for no reason and without hesitation. Sometimes soldiers crack from battle stress and startle at any loud noise or footsteps in the dark and react instinctively as if they were back in battle. Your husband could well beat or kill you and your children without even thinking.
  47. Rent the DVD The Great Santini. Some military men bring their notions of discipline home and drive their families nuts. They are more likely to order their wives about and treat children as objects because that is what they are trained to do.
  48. If you train a soldier to shoot a five year old without batting an eye, on the grounds the child might be concealing a grenade, you have to expect him to be somewhat callous when he returns to family life. He will think nothing of dashing his infant son against a wall or threatening his wife with a handgun if she fails to do the dishes.
  49. Think long and hard about why he enlisted. Don’t just blindly accept the first trite lie you are given. Recruiting posters always talk of defending the homeland even when your country clearly attacked first and the other country is a small fraction the size of yours. There are two kinds of wars:

    1. A war where your country is attacked.
    2. A war where your country attacked someone else.

    Usually in the first type there is a draft and in the second there is not, though there was a draft for the Viet Nam war. There is a pressing need for young men to defend their country in the first sort of war. In the second, there is not. The first sort of war is legal; the second is not.

    Why then do people enlist for the second type of war? They are obviously well aware they will be asked to bully, torture and kill children, women and men, so they could not have that big an objection to doing it.

    These are just some of the good reasons to stay well away from such psychotic people as friends, lovers or spouses.


Women often write me protesting that they love their soldier husbands. I don’t doubt that. Soldiers tend to be fit, sexy and fun companions. I am just warning you of the dangers of selection one for a husband.

Hollywood usually portrays soldiers as adult boy scouts. So powerful is that Hollywood image that Americans conveniently forget that their soldiers have killed well over a million Iraqi children. That nobility might have described most of the soldiers in . Don’t and II, but not the soldiers who volunteered for killing when their own nation was not attacked e.g. in Viet Nam, Afghanistan or Iraq. A more typical soldier today is a gang member who discovers the army is the only employer that will accept a loser like him, or a psychopath who wants free reign to loot, rape, torture and kill with almost no possibility of prosecution, at least from American courts. Americans have no trouble believing soldiers from other countries are thugs, but insist their own are saintly. There is no reason at all that should be so. What drives this delusion is the same sort of idiotic pride that besotted the Nazis with their master race nonsense. American soldiers have the same failings as any other soldiers.

Today’s American soldiers are not draftees. Of all possible vocations, they chose killing, mostly civilians and of them mostly children. They are seriously sick individuals. If anything, America behaves worse than any other militaries, ignoring the Geneva conventions as quaint, using routine torture and banned weapons. It foolish national pride that leads Americans to claim their soldiers behave infinitely better than any other soldiers.

There are women who fully understand they are marrying serial killers/soldiers, but do it anyway. They see me as hateful either for disproving of their husbands murderous activity, or for accusing their husbands of murder. Some may be so naïve they don’t believe the primary function of soldier is killing people, but most are completely aware of what their husbands do and they get a sexual charge from it. They are repressed serial killers themselves. They get their jollies vicariously. They strongly don’t like it that I have no respect for people who murder or egg on murders. It is perfectly normal to despise child killers, or grandma killers. These twisted women want us to make an exception for their husbands. I lump them with the nutcases who marry incarcerated serial killers, trying to convince everyone else that under the murderous exterior of their partner lurks a lovable teddy bear. They know perfectly well what sort of partner they have chosen. They are living out their own sick fantasies through him. The ones who marry soldiers are even sicker that the ones who marry the incarcerated because their partners are free to keep on murdering and thus provide endless titillation. Oddly because of indoctrination with military propaganda, most Americas will buy the BS these women sling to defend themselves and their husbands. I flatly refuse to believe such crap. It drives them nuts. They know what they are doing is wrong. Having even one person call them on their lies stings their consciences.

Serial killers on death row may often attract a dozen or so female groupies. Why are the women doing that? I think it goes back to our pre-civilisation days. There was no law to protect you, just a big, mean, nasty mate willing and able to dispatch anyone who threatened you. I think some women are acting on this primitive drive. Even normal women prefer large, well-muscled men. Then there are the large numbers of women pathologically attracted to men in the military who kill for a living. The idea of killing excites them, but they don’t want the direct involvement that they would get if they enlisted themselves.

One of the most bizarre excuses for the Iraq war that Americans give me is that they are defending their freedom from attack by Iraq. What attack? 2001-09-11? Even president Bush on 2003-09-17, said that Saddam Hussein had nothing to do with 2001-09-11. Bush said bin Laden, a Saudi and a small band of Saudi Al-Qaeda was responsible. Everyone saw the USA bomb the residential sections of Baghdad live on CNN on 2003-03-20, the opening day of the war, not the reverse. There was no WMD (Weapon of Mass Destruction) attack. There were not even any WMDs. Perhaps Americans are offended that Iraqis attacked them when the US military illegally invaded their country and started plundering it. That is defence, not attack. What American freedom did Iraqis interfere with — the American divine right to steal? The war was not even about liberating Iraqis from Saddam since Saddam offered to surrender before the war and was deposed the instant the war started. If regime change were truly what the war were about, the war should have ended as soon as Saddam was captured on 2003-12-13 (14 years and 4 months ago). It raged on even more fiercely, without even a hiccup, indicating there was something else fueling it. Hint what does Iraq have billions of barrels of that the USA thinks it desperately needs, needs badly enough to kill and torture children for? War is about stealing other people’s resources. The rest is patriotic bullshit to sell them to gullible people.
~ Roedy (1948-02-04 age:70)


You might wonder why I wrote this essay. The deaths of innocent people haunt me. I think about them as I lie trying to sleep. I try to think what I could do to stop ignorant Americans from committing these crimes, particularly killing and torturing children in Afghanistan and Iraq. I feel personally responsible since it seems I am one of the few people who gives a damn. I have found soldiers the most ignorant people on the planet and the most stubbornly proud of that ignorance. They have been brainwashed into thinking killing and torture are good. I don’t have much hope of directly convincing them to give up their life of crime, though I try. However, the women who support these men are perhaps a bit more amenable to reason. If I could convince women to avoid soldiers as sexual partners, it would make life as a soldier more difficult. If I could convince women to avoid soldiers as sexual partners, I could save those women from a life of misery. If I could convince women to avoid soldiers as sexual partners, I could prevent those soldiers from passing on their defective genes. If I could destroy the reputation of soldiers as life partners, then soldiers might avoid the profession just to get laid. From the furious response, I am hitting a nerve. I find it astounding that anyone will publicly champion child rapists, child killers and child torturers, but that is what the majority of responders do. They are as sick as the soldiers.

If you have any doubts about your fiancé, those doubts are most likely to grow over time. You need to be very sure about a choice of life partner. A serial killer who will rarely be home is hardly the best father material. You are choosing both for yourself and your potential children. Save yourself heartache and choose a man you can solidly trust to be kind and loving instead. You deserve that.

P.S. I am using the term soldier in the generic sense of anyone in the military, which would include navy, air force and marines. They all chose to kill people for a living. Most of them committed a capital crime by aiding and abetting either of the two illegal aggressive wars: Afghanistan and Iraq.


This essay tends to generate a lot of feedback of the form “I want to/am going to kill you. You are wrong. Change it to be pro-US military. How dare you not worship the ground US soldiers walk on. You would not be alive if it were not for them killing children on your behalf. The USA is #1, rah, rah, rah. Everybody else is a stinky raghead. You are not worthy to lick our asses.” It would be rather irresponsible of me to ignore all my sources and arguments and rewrite my essay to suit some anonymous boor on the Internet who offered no reasons or sources for his/her opinions. If you disagree with some fact I have asserted, please point to a definitive source, rather than just saying everything you said is untrue However, I doubt there is anying you could say that would convince me to have even the tiniest bit of respect for someone who makes his living killing children. I wrote this and related essays about circa 2002. Unfortunately, since then many of the supporting links have gone stale and I had to remove them. Unfortunately, the most important ones were to documents on the Bush White House website, now all withdrawn. That is not under my control. I asked the White House to put them back, or archive them and predictably, they ignored me. I consider people who approve of butchering children in Afghanistan and Iraq mentally ill, in the legal sense of not understanding the difference between right and wrong. They are going to have to work very hard to convince me I am wrong, just as I would not take at face value something someone living in an insane asylum told me. They will need to marshal facts and logical argument. They can’t just bluster or bully me. If they actually joined the military, when they enlisted, they signed a contract agreeing to butcher children for no reason other than being ordered to. That makes them a repulsive and dangerous psychopath, in my book. How can I possibly trust anything they say? By the way, those kids have every right to blow the damn heads off US military. America invaded their country unprovoked and illegally.

You might ask, but did not the conscripts and enlistees of WWII do the same thing? Yes and they committed atrocities too, however, they had the excuse they had to defend their country. Modern soldiers have no such excuse. Neither Afghanistan nor Iraq attacked or threatened the USA.

I don’t claim that each of these points in itself is sufficient reason to reject a soldier spouse or that every point applies to every soldier. I am saying that you would be wise to consider each factor and to decide for yourself how well it fits your particular case. I am saying that overall, soldiers are quite attractive in the short run because of their fit bodies, but usually will make your life miserable in the long run. Go in with your eyes wide open. Make sure you talk to a number of military wives first. And don’t say I didn’t warn you. If you go ahead anyway, you fully deserve whatever happens to you.

I have written many essays critical of war and soldiers. However, this is the one that drives the sadists who favour killing children apoplectic. Why is that? Perhaps they feel confident I will never stop the Pentagon from providing them opportunities to kill and torture children, but women might read my essay and be convinced to cut off their supply of penis lubricant. They already know they are poor relationship material. This essay just rubs their noses in it. That is why they squirm when they read it.


When there are no wars, soldiers do exercises to prepare for rescue from earthquake, flood and other natural disasters. This is a challenging work and completely admirable. The objections I stated above would not apply.

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