sexual abuse : Gay & Black Glossary


sexual abuse

I have been to a large number of workshops where mainly women revealed they had been sexually abused as children, usually by their fathers. Statics suggest this happens to one half of all women. This is an astoundingly frequent. It suggests the behaviour is normal, in the sense of common. In our closest cousin, the bonobo, this behaviour is universal. This leads me to speculate that his behaviour must have some Darwinian survival value. In primitive times, if a male selected his mate before she reached puberty, then jealously kept all other males away from her he reaped two benefits:

But what survival advantage is there in a father having sex with a pre-pubescent daughter? All I can think of is this is less dangerous than having sex with some other man’s mate.

People often put their lives on hold when they realise the seriousness of the taboo they and their abuser broke when they had a sexual encounter. This painful realisation usually happens many years after the actual event. The original event could be as mild as clothed touching or kissing. The child might even have been the instigator, or it could have been as traumatic as a violent rape.

Some of the things people do that don’t work to help an abuse victim include:

In case after case, well meaning boobs end up doing far more psychological damage than the original incident.

Some of the things people do that do work to help an abuse victim include:

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