lover : Gay & Black Glossary


Someone you live with in a sexual relationship. Both of you acknowledge the relationship to your friends, but not necessarily to your families. The relationship may be monogamous or open, though your lover is your prime interest. Sometimes the term may be used for couples that do not live together. There is no formal commitment to stay together. In straight society lover often implies an adulterous relationship, not so in gay.

The meaning for gays implies some commitment. It does not mean an adulterous affair. Many years ago I tried to place a personal ad in the West Ender newspaper that used the word lover. The matron in charge forbade the use of such a scandalous word and insisted on the word soul mate which was not at all what I meant.

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