Toilet Etiquette

There are three ways to leave a toilet seat. Here are the arguments for each:

  1. Fully up. This is the way males need it to urinate. Leaving it this way will encourage them to urinate with it up, especially elderly males who may have trouble reaching down to flip it up. It gives the best view of the toilet bowl so it easy to see that it needs cleaning. Males will be less likely to miss and hit the toilet seat.
  2. Seat down. This is the way females need it to urinate. Females usually imperiously insist on it being left this way as a sign of respect, even when they are in a minority. They complain they fall into the water if someone leaves the seat up and they do not notice.
  3. Fully down, closed. This prevents a fine spray of water and bacteria from entering the room when the toilet is flushed. It also masks the noise of flushing. The disadvantage is you will not notice an incomplete flush. It has no implication of male or female dominance. It discourages small children from throwing things into the water or pets from using it as a drinking fountain. It is couth, suggesting the residents of this home hardly ever need to use it so they keep it covered.

You can also leave the seat the way the person you think will most likely use the toilet next will like it. That might be you.

When will the Japanese invent a toilet seat that recognises whether the person approaching it is male or female and whether they want to pee, poo, or vomit and adjust the seat appropriately, leaving it down after they are done. Perhaps you would wear a little tag on your zipper to give it a clue.

As a bonus, perhaps it could give you a gentle spray of orange-scented disinfectant soap.

~ Roedy (1948-02-04 age:70)